A year ago my life changed drastically when I became the mother of a son. For an introvert like me, this meant that I really had to find my way around this. I'm slowly getting used to it and I like to share my experiences.
In a way you could say that I may have underestimated it a bit: the short nights, the always being on and the fact that you are now "mummy of" forever. I see myself as someone who can adapt quite quickly to change, but becoming a mother took me a little more time and energy than I could have imagined beforehand.
As an introvert I desperately need my charging time, especially because I'm used to always getting the most out of a day. So I didn't take less of that, but mainly in a different way. For example, I really like sleeping in the other way around: going to bed early, so that you are well rested the next morning when the little one wakes up early. Or taking afternoon naps while my son sleeps. It may sound like a luxury, but it's a necessity every now and then.
My son is usually quite independent, but at times when there are major developmental leaps, he can become a bit more affectionate. In the beginning I really had to find my way around it, but now I use those moments to really take some time together. For example, take a nice walk or play together. It helps me put things into perspective a bit more.
Switching off
Taking time for yourself can also be quite difficult as a young mother. In my coaching training, I learned from day one that you first have to take care of yourself before you can take good care of someone else. That fact helps me to switch off every now and then and do something for myself. I even allowed myself a whole week of relaxation next summer, to fully refuel. After moments like that I can really enjoy the time with my son twice as much.
I think one of the most difficult things is the unsolicited advice that you suddenly receive. I don't believe there's just one way to do things, but there are certain people who are adamant that there is when it comes to babies. As an introvert, it sometimes happens to me that I only really have a good answer ready afterwards. A matter of practice I guess.
Of course I also regularly wonder if my son might also have introverted traits. In the beginning he really wanted to be present everywhere and I thought I recognized more extroverted traits, but now he can also do something for himself. He even appears to sit under the table at daycare every now and then, so maybe there is also an introverted side to him. Time will tell.
Want to read more tips on being an introverted mom? I previously wrote this article about it.
