Have you already made a number of plans to do things differently, but are you still unable to actually do it? Not surprising, because change can be pretty difficult. Why is it so difficult to change and can you make it possible? A few tips.
Finding a new job, giving yourself more space or stopping to adapt all the time: these are things that many of my clients want to work on. They have often tried this on their own, but sooner or later they notice that they are not really getting any further. The will is there, but taking concrete steps appears to be a lot more difficult.
This has to do with several things. First, humans are real creatures of habit. We prefer to keep doing things as we have always done, because it costs us less energy. Learning a new habit takes on average about two months. Quite an investment of time and therefore it is not surprising that you naturally prefer to continue on the old foot. Staying in your comfort zone is therefore easier than stepping out of it. But outside that comfort zone is exactly where your growth is and so you will have to step out of that if you want to move forward.
Protection
In addition, as humans we also have all kinds of protection mechanisms that come into effect as soon as we start doing something new. Your body prefers to keep you in your comfort zone, because it is safe there. If you go beyond that, all alarm bells will go off and fear will often keep you from taking real steps. Unless you actively work with that fear and overcome it.
Once you've taken the step toward change, don't be too hard on yourself. We often tend to want everything quickly and perfectly, when change takes time. As a result, you unnecessarily push yourself and change only becomes more difficult. Give yourself the space to grow and to make mistakes every now and then. Learning is simply not possible without doing something wrong.
By dividing the change into smaller, achievable goals, it becomes a lot more concrete and simpler. Focus on growth instead of performance. So not: I want a new job as soon as possible, but: I want to find a job that really suits me. In this way you disconnect your search from your self-esteem and the focus is more on what it brings you instead of what you should achieve.
Do you finally want to take steps in your own growth? I am happy to help you with that as a coach. Please feel free to contact me for more information.
